Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Online Dialog Forum -> General Forum -> Perchance to dream...
Post Info TOPIC: Perchance to dream...
Mindcrime


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 673
Date:
Perchance to dream...
Permalink Closed

A friend sent me this, and I thought I'd share. While a couple of the sentiments I don't
agree with, overall...it made me crack up. We could only wish to have a leader with enough you-know-whats that would say this. I can dream, can't I?


WOULDN'T IT  BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S.  PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?
 
My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraqi regime has been completed. Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete. This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from  Iraq.  This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now to begin the reckoning.
 
Before  me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of  countries which have  stood by our side during the  Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria,  Australia, and Poland  are some of the countries listed there. The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.


Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi  war. The American  people are no longer going to pour money into third world  Hell-holes and  watch those government leaders grow fat on  corruption.
 
Need  help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call  France.


In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that  note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.  
 
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try Korea, or maybe China.
 
To Israel  and the Palestinian Authority. Yo, boys. Work out a peace deal now. Just note that Camp David is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for negotiations. They have some great palaces there. Big tables, too. I  am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with  France,  Germany, and Russia.  Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well.  Bon chance, mes amis.  
 
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid  tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your  precious Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York.


A special note to our neighbors.  Canada  is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.   
Mexico  is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil. 


Oh,  by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting  now.
 
We are tired  of the one-way highway. It is time for  America  to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of  isolationism. I answer them by saying, "Hell, yeah."

Nearly a  century of trying to help folks live a decent life around  the
world has only  earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is  time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate homelessness in America.  It is time to eliminate World Cup Soccer from America. To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you and  we won't forget. 

To  the nations on List 2, a final thought. Drop dead.
 
God bless America. Thank you and good night.


This would be televised at noon, when there's nothing on TV but soaps and talk shows to interrupt.



__________________
Never criticize someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you DO criticize them, you are a mile away, and you have their shoes... If you choose any truth and follow it blindly, it becomes a falsehood, and you, a fanatic.
kspeer


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 414
Date:
Permalink Closed

I like it! Eliminating the foreign aid would be great. And definitely ridding ourselves of the most boring sport in the world would be a blessing. When my boys get asked to play in these idiotic soccer leagues, we tell them soccer is a girl's sport so they won't want to play.

__________________
Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.
Anonymous

Date:
Permalink Closed

To suddenly inject honesty into American government would cause political cardiac arrest. If politicians actually made decisions based on common sense and reality rather than inside dealings and shady practices, what a world it would be. It would destroy nearly every person in office now. Although, it would be nice to sit back with a glass of red wine and watch the chaos ensue...


Maybe Scott has a point with his single term limit for every public office. One chance is all you get. Then yer out. [takes a sip]


 


Phantom 



__________________
Anonymous

Date:
Permalink Closed

Too bad foreign aid isn't even 1% of our spending.



__________________
jspeer


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 636
Date:
Permalink Closed


Anonymous wrote:
Too bad foreign aid isn't even 1% of our spending.

Tough Sh@$! 1 percent helps when your talking about trillions of dollars. I think all the countries on list 2 should be cut off from even visiting our country.....Including the Canuck Bastards to the North! That was cool MC

__________________
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe." Albert Einstein
Anonymous

Date:
Permalink Closed

Anonymous wrote:

Too bad foreign aid isn't even 1% of our spending.
Yeah, considering 50% is for the military, how could we afford any more, you dingleberry...

__________________
Anonymous

Date:
Permalink Closed

Whenever I hear about "Freedom Fries" or other France-bashing, I have to laugh.


If it weren't for France's help during our Revolutionary War, including but not limited to bottling up the British at Yorktown, there wouldn't even be a United States of America!



__________________
Anonymous

Date:
Permalink Closed

Oh yeah, and thank God for the Italians.


They could have named us The United States of Vespucciland, if they wanted to.


Vespucciland, Love it or Leave it !!!



__________________
Nukedlou


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 55
Date:
Permalink Closed


Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Too bad foreign aid isn't even 1% of our spending.
Yeah, considering 50% is for the military, how could we afford any more, you dingleberry...

I think even 1% wasted on foreign add for a bunch of ingrates is too much. And as for 50% on military... good for us. Let that be an advertisement to the world that the protection of our people is a high priority. What would you rather see 50% to help countries that hate us and 1% on military? You are obviously a Brainless Scrotum Sack who values nothing!

__________________
"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me." Emo Philips
mike of the mountain


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 408
Date:
Permalink Closed

the foreign aid issue is not as simple as it looks , much of it is not in money but in products , like obsolete military hardware [F16s Phantom 2s, tanks of all kinds but not the m1 ] including "consultants" to train the recipients [american jobs and profits] , and medical assistance ? obsolete drugs ? again with "consultants" , and let us not forget "grain" , food ,   our state department spends much time and money deciding where to put what for what reason .   many serious problems have been shunted to the toilet by judicious application of american "foreign aid"     at least some of it is not really for the recipents but to promote the interests and well being of our own selves .     


many times bribes have proven cheaper than war , both in money and lives .


  it looks like our military will be comeing home through iran , a slight detour , foreign aid wont work on that issue , diplomacy is failing fast ....  



-- Edited by mike of the mountain at 23:16, 2005-06-23

__________________
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
Online Dialog Forum -> General Forum -> Perchance to dream...
Tweet this page Post to Digg Post to Del.icio.us


Create your own FREE Forum
Report Abuse 		Powered by ActiveBoard